February 20, 2021 – The beauty of anonymity.

Have you ever thought about what it must be like to be a celebrity or a public servant or someone widely known based on their talent or stature? Personally, it sounds awful. To face public scrutiny continually because you’re ‘famous’ for one reason or another? No, thanks! I know there has to be an ‘upside’ to it all but I cannot imagine that it outweighs the ‘downside’. I kid you not, when I pulled up my email account today, several of the ‘news’ articles that were featured on the main page were about different people facing some type of scandal because of their public lives. There was Kevin Federline’s take on Britney Spears’ conservatorship, Ellen Degeneres discussing how her wife kept her anchored during her scandal last year, Fox News ripping Ted Cruz for fleeing to Cancun during the recent deadly storm, Bill Gates weighing in on Trump’s possible permanent Facebook ban, and the domestic violence allegations involving Marilyn Manson taking a new turn.

Seriously, can you imagine living ‘in the limelight’? I’ve thought about what it must be like and none of it sounds appealing, aside from the money. However, I don’t think any amount of money can make up for having to live under a microscope. The first thing you lose is your privacy and privacy is priceless. You can no longer walk freely about without someone recognizing who you are and wanting ‘a piece’. Whether it’s your image or your thoughts or your autograph, your life is no longer your own. Photographers lurk around every corner, waiting to catch you at ‘your worst’. Scandals sell, so the bigger the scandal, the better. People come into your life and you can never really know if their ‘friendship’ is genuine or whether they have an agenda. If anything questionable happened in your past, you can guarantee one of your former schoolmates or teachers or neighbors or friends is going to spill the beans. Any skeleton that might have been lurking in your closet will be set free!

If you’re interested in going out for a stroll, you’d better make sure you get a shower, wash and dry and style your hair, put on your finest and ‘be ready’. Should you simply throw on whatever’s handy and it doesn’t necessarily help you look your best, you’re going to hear about it. Because you crossed the boundary line from your property onto a public right-of-way (sidewalk, street), you are now ‘fair game’. From the hat on your head, all the way down to the shoes on your feet, the ‘press’ is going to pick you apart. They’re going to splash your image on the internet and add their little commentary about how you schlepped around in some crappy sweatpants when you make millions of dollars, and then Joe Public is going to have a feeding frenzy. How dare you! How dare you appear ‘human’ and ‘flawed’ like the rest of us? Shame on you! You’re not allowed to leave your home without having a bevy of assistants ensure you look presentable.

What’s sad is that you haven’t even opened your mouth yet other than to breathe or cough or sigh or take a sip of your latte. Wait until you actually say something aloud. Oh, Lord! I hope you thought about it beforehand and wrote it down and had your assistant and a couple of your ‘people’ review it first, because if you say anything perceived as ‘wrong’, your public persona could be over ‘just like that’. Yes, your stunning wardrobe and that beautiful home you reside in with the spectacular view and that luxurious car you drive that handles like a dream, as hard as you worked to earn it, one wrong ‘move’ and it could all cease to exist. You are not allowed to discuss your political or religious views. You are not allowed to show any signs of weakness. You are not allowed to talk about your past, present or future partners. You are to stay neutral and never discuss anything controversial and should you do so, know that should you be sued, you brought it on yourself.

And while we’re at it, you’d better keep your weight consistent, unless you’re fat. If you’re fat, you’re going to need to lose weight unless you want people to ceaselessly pick on you. And despite how alluring drugs and alcohol might be because you’re overwhelmed from all the constant judgment and just want to escape, don’t you touch either of them! That’s showing weakness and you’re not allowed to be weak. I have to say, how people do it and don’t lose their sanity is beyond me. How do you even trust anyone when you know so many people are trying to get a piece of the pie? The ones I feel the most sorry for are child singers and actors. So many people exploit them and use them for every nickel they’re worth, and once they show any ‘humanness’, people throw them away like a piece of garbage. It’s really sad. The people that should be looking out for them are usually just as insidious as the rest. Who do you depend on in a scenario like that?

Speaking of ‘child singers’, I heard Billie Eilish has a damn stalker now! That poor girl is only 19 years of age and now she’s got a mentally deranged person to contend with. Life is hard enough to navigate without having to deal with strange people that clearly don’t understand boundaries. What I cannot begin to understand is why anyone in their right mind would want to be ‘president’. Whether it is the president of a bank, the president of a company or the President of the United States, you had better be on your best behavior because everything you say and do is going to be evaluated and judged. You will be subjected to the court of public opinion at every turn, whether you like it or not. Fewer people, of course, are going to care if you’re the president of a bank or the president of a company, but because of your position, you will be subjected to scrutiny. Because of your role as president, you have a duty to only reveal your ‘best’ side.

Should anything come out of your mouth that sounds sexist, racist, ignorant, uneducated, or anti-anything, you, my friend, have opened a door that you will likely never be able to close again. Once it leaves your mouth and enters the atmosphere, it doesn’t matter how quickly you retract the statement, you cannot take it back. It’s going to end up on Facebook and Instagram and Twitter and YouTube and the nightly news. And once it’s out there, you’d better hang on for a bumpy ride because (depending on who you are), anywhere from dozens to millions of people are going to be aware of what you said and will now sentence you without a formal hearing. No, thank you!! I like my anonymity. In fact, I love it!! I love that I can enter a grocery store and schlep around in my grungy sweatpants and no one gives a care. I love that I have the ability to say ignorant things without worrying that once they ‘hit the airwaves’, droves of people will start protesting outside my front door.

I love that if I develop a UTI and cannot control my bladder while taking my dog for a walk, a photo of me isn’t going to end up splashed across the cover of a magazine. I love that if I want to go to Cancun because I don’t have water or power and I just want to get away and splash in the waves and lay in the sun, no one’s going to get incensed. I love that if I lose 60 pounds, half the country isn’t going to be placing bets on whether I gain it all back. Most of all, I love that I don’t have to worry about people using me or only befriending me because they have an agenda and believe there could be a payday in it if they hang around long enough. The people in my life know better than that! Thank you so much for stopping by. I’m no poet laureate or anyone with significant credentials to speak of but I do enjoy the opportunity to share things about my life and family or to just make simple random observations. If all goes well and I haven’t run you off, I trust you will return tomorrow as will I.

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